Black Belt Blog - Mas Bob

I have always secretly had a passion for martial arts. Growing up, I loved to watch campy, poorly dubbed martial arts films with the powerful villain being overcome by the humble, yet devoted protagonist who never thought they were worthy. I dreamed of becoming a Black Belt, but I was an out-of-shape introvert, scared to make a mistake in front of anyone.

But I secretly kept dreaming.

I finally decided to enroll in an Aikido class, and I remember watching the instructor effortlessly throw people around while repeating, “Why use your energy when you can use your opponent’s energy against them?” It was really cool until I started working with students who all seemed to want to show that they were quicker, stronger, and more skilled than me. That pretty much killed any thought of me training martial arts.

Fast forward 10 years. I was now married, had two kids, and worked full time. While looking for activities for the kids, my wife found the kids program at One With Heart. The kids really enjoyed their class with Mas Sandra!

I was in the hallway watching class when I recognized another parent as someone I had worked with years ago. I met her wife, Morgan, and we hit it off immediately. After weeks of talking in the hall, Morgan said she thought it would be cool to train as an adult. After a moment of blank stares between us, we each said, “I’ll do it if you do it!”

My intro classes were in the hallway with Pendekar Gerry, learning how to get out of a choke from the front. I still remember screwing up and Pendekar Gerry simply saying, “Don’t worry about it man.” The introvert in me crumbled a bit that day and I decided to sign up.

Working with the other students my age was awesome. But at some point, my training seemed endless as I watched other people do things I couldn’t and get promoted while I just continued training. Frankly, I was jealous and determined to keep up with the younger crowd. Then, I realized I wasn’t having fun anymore.

It was a while before I understood and embraced the sayings, “Your journey is your own” and “Pukulan is a broken mirror system.” I finally accepted that it is OK to learn at my own pace and do things as my body allows me to, and I was able to start having fun in my training again.

I kept training and getting stripes and was eventually put up to test for my Brown Sash. And I got injured. At my age, I wondered if I should keep going or use this as an excuse to bow out. I was furious; I had come too far to give up, so I persevered. At the end of the test, I was exhausted, but I was a Brown Sash.

“No Black Belt for me,” I thought.

Yeah, right. Mas Guru Agung Janesa is not about stagnation and my training continued. Before my first stripe Brown Sash test, I had two life-changing events. In February 2024, I had a small stroke. In the hospital, I had too much time to think about what gave my life meaning. I pretty much made a full physical recovery, but mentally I was just trying to cope.

And then my mother died. She had been battling pancreatic cancer for months and I was fortunate to get to spend time with her around Easter. My father was not part of my life, so it was my mother who was always around to help out. She died at home with my family by her side.

My test was awful. I failed to do just about everything that was asked of me. I remember an intense feeling of loneliness, like I was drowning as a crowd of people watched me go down.

As I reflected on my feelings, I realized I needed to reach out to other people around me. When I did, I saw that everyone was still supportive of me and that life goes on even if you just crashed and burned. So, I kept training.

In the distance, I saw a Black Belt test. As one of the oldest students, I wondered, can I do this? Should I do this? This test was going to be the hardest thing I had ever attempted.

But I realized that without One With Heart I would simply collect dust at home and never push myself. I accepted that there were slight risks and decided to go forward. The test was announced and it was going to be me, Zach, Adam, Candido, and Shelby.

What a great group of people to test with! I learned to ask for help. I tried to remain humble and to know that I would make mistakes (and, boy, did I make mistakes). And during the test, MGA Janesa reminded everyone that none of us had to be there, that she was not making us take this test and that we could quit any time. I finally understood why the Black Belt test is more mental than physical; it is easy to quit.

No way! You can throw me out for lack of ability or knowledge, but not for lack of trying!

I was a Black Belt – a dream come true!

I wish everyone could train and test for a Black Belt. I came away from the test with eternal gratitude for family, friends, and just being alive. There are always obstacles to overcome, but with the right mindset and patience, they can be overcome.

Peace,
Mas Bob.